Thanks brother …u r right need to take big break and move away from this addiction now. Should have taken break when loss was very small…lost hard earn money no point in regretting need to learn from losses and need to avoid same mistakes again…thnx 
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This may sound harsh, but some people do it while investing, they write down their thesis for an investment, some even write on paper. So you too can write what mistakes did you do, what you should have done but did not do, on a paper and keep it with you always. Whenever in the future, when you are not ready but want to trade, read this paper, it may help you, but be very honest in writing this.
Also, design a system to trade, create a method, a process, which can be used to trade, just like building a house brick by brick, you can build a system. Once you have a system, including a strict stop loss, trading gets better, there will not be uncontrollable losses. You will have capital for other trades.
And more importantly, ask yourself why are you doing this, is it for money, or is it to tell people that you have made money, or is to prove yourself that you can do it, be honest with yourself.
You can build yourself again, financial losses can be recovered with discipline and dedication.
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Thnx friend.yes need to concentrate on job and life .will be taking break from trading should have done this long time back when loss was small…did not learn from mistake…greed fast recovery cost me very very badly.
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I can write an essay about highlighting the reasons for your loss and more about what you could have done, it will add fuel to the fire, I can feel what you go through.
say with 20L capital you could have shorted deep OTM with hedge and generated a safe 50k per week.
many people like me when doing intraday and if the 1st trade goes in loss our mind immediately shifts to loss covering mode and try to cover the loss in next trade and resulting in more losses the same day.
for you I guess your mindset is fully loss covering mode and lost almost all capital.
Please device a strategy 1st, paper trade for some days, leave out the winning trades( you know why you have entered and made it a winning trade) analyze the loosing trades and see what had gone wrong and what you could have done to that trade to not to make the same mistake again.
After you get some confidence start with 1lot and no naked buying/selling. once you are consistent then you can increase the lots.
Note: 1) Index trading needs to be monitored whole day and mostly one who is full time can do, with a regular job part time is strictly not advised.
2) I was once in your position at the beginning but soon I realized and stopped trading bulk, even today I start with 1 or 2 lots initially.
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Frankly I can think of a person or two who can mentor you; but I think you need to take time off for now. Maybe next year you could start again very small. In the meantime learn. You can earn it back, you really can.
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Yes thanks friend my major mistake till now is not learning from losses strict sl , not adding extra amount for trading and no averaging… should have followed atleast these 3 rules but will take break now if i start trading abain will put down all mistake on paper … hopefully atleast i will learn this time.
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@VijayNair yes right … going to take break now .will avoid trading and if i start will start properly with very small amount and with all rules.
Feeling bad bcoz amt was huge almost all saving and it took 16. Years to collect this money n took few days to loss all…have to avoid such gambling
It is affecting everyone in family…
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Don’t say hopefully if it is hard earned money, say that you will do it. It is in your hands to do or not to do, be strong.
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@Yogarajan_V you are absolutely right my losses are always huge if i had cut losses say even at 20k i would have been in profit of20l atleast but trying to be right or profitable in every trade cost me badly. I define rule but don’t follow it properly …yes will take break now…
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@GB26 yes …going to avoid trading completely and before entering market again i will do mock trading with all rules and whenever i came back i will make sure that I will come back string with proper rules n guidelines.
For now will take break …it has become more of addiction to me …n
My major mistake like every one said i m aware of is trying to be in profit in every trade n one reason I am aware of is after certain loss say 50k i lost all senses n end up doing revenge trading.
Will avoid all mistake and will go very slow now and that too after break only
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sorry if this hurts but you seem to be having less knowledge about market especially options. You need to learn A to Z about how market and FO works. Forget about 40 lakhs, what ever the capital you have now think that as your capital. If you trade again having 40 lakhs loss in mind, even if your strategy and everything else is perfect you will still end up in loss.
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Best solution I can give now is better stop seeing trading terminal and hit the gym. Gym fixes everyone if not gym do jump rope. Follow this for 3 months. Your life would be manageable and would look at this bloom & crash more analytically and maybe even understand yourself better.
The best thing you got
This is a vital thing you got from your trading. Now you need to figure out your risk management and money management and make it work. Maybe after some 5 months break or even after a year you can connect dots and put the pieces together.
About 40 lakhs , hmm honestly I think this looks like a problem in short term but really in long term it doesn’t matter. You can make money. You still have skills from job. Just take express entry visa to Canada for 3 to 4 years live well below means like a gopnik. 40 lakhs = 66k $ . You would make this money back . People make 1 cr in 5 years working in US/Canada and buy property in india. Even if you don’t have skills you can still go as truck driver or something. There are ways.
People have lost money doing very stupid things dating wrong person, costly marriage ending up with divorce, buying real estate and loss, taking home on loans for rent forgetting yeilds are worse etc. Well, atleast You have learned something. That’s what matters.
My advice is stop chasing that 40 lakhs back. If you have house completely paid off you don’t even need that money. Focus your time for recovery then you can step back and analyse what went wrong.
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yes. Always your 1st priority should be capital preserving, profit is next. In future treat every trade as new. Its very hard but you need to overcome this loss covering, revenge trading, quick profit etc. and most importantly accept the loss and don’t try to predict the market, try to sail over it
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No friend you are absolutely right my loss is due to revenge/emotional trading with heavy capital. Yes need to focus on learning rules n following them strictly
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Thanks brother yes u r right completely agree with you.
Yes I used to go to run everyday n it does keep my mood fresh and it used to affect all work job family trading in positive way.
Even today i have good job for now I need to take break and focus on it …yes loss is say high but not end of life …if i study well introspect trades my trading style mistake I can come back strong…will take break now…will study hard then admfter that will come back in market 
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Yes my major issues are not following things even after knowing them…like cutting losses, using sl, not averaging, stopping trade when loss goes 1-2% more than capital.
Have to work very hard on this
Loss should remain in mind so that I won’t do such mistakes again.
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Thanks @Meher_Smaran yes will follow all suggestions. All things are correct little control on myself and using small capitals for 1-2 years would have avoided loss and also provided learning. But, will folly all things from hereoon
Truly sorry for the loss of dream capital. What I really liked about you is that you shared this publicly for dual benefits invisibly, to you (recognize mistakes and accept learnings) and to others (learn and get serious ahead of unfortunate experience).
Think of your capital as your family, little reasonable fights and arguments are normal but betting them into an uncertain future surely leads to a significant loss at the best chance available. May we all proactively seek solutions for little things to save the unimaginable mess.
Also for future learning, unstoppable at Gym (or trading in that sense) will land us in the hospital despite following the steps correctly. The body needs a good amount of rest to solidify its strength. (Take a good break from trading time to time)
More success to you in the future @Vikii
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I know everybody else would disagree with me, forget disagreement most of the people will call me an idiot, but this is what I feel.
Having an alternate source of income is one of the reasons for such big loss. Had trading been your primary source of income, somewhere in your mind you would have always worried that what if you lose your entire capital and that worry would have prevented you from taking bigger bets.
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